“Thoughts” by KW

Recently, I witnessed a “discussion” on social media. It happened to be on the topic of hitting, so naturally, I was drawn to it. But after seeing the first initial comments along with its content, I knew the comments would be lively and had the potential to turn into one of those nasty, knock-down-drag-out debates – a verbal WWIII if you will.

Hitting a baseball is by far the most debated topic in sports. I don’t know why, but it seems that everyone has an opinion on how a player should swing. It doesn’t matter if you were a hitter or a pitcher when you played, or never even played past little league, everyone seems to have an opinion on what they think is the best way to do it or what the best practices are in order to become the best at hitting a baseball.

As I scrolled down the long list of comments, I started to shake my head. I wasn’t shaking my head so much over the information in those comments (even though some of the information was not good information) but more importantly and more alarming, was the presence of so much hate.

Many people try so hard to be right. They want to push their own philosophy and terminology so they can show they have their foot in the door. It leads to coaches judging one another and throwing their opinions around to prove they are right and the other person is wrong.

Now let’s pause for a moment and remind ourselves that as coaches, it is our responsibility to take care of those around us. That means taking a sincere interest in the person first, before investing in the player second. It means pouring into your coaching staff, empowering them to lead the way, even if they aren’t doing it entirely right the first time through. It’s about serving others, before yourself. In its simplest form, it’s being a servant.

But when my eyes fall back on my iPad, I don’t see any servants. I see judges.  

As I continue to scroll through the comments, I feel the tensions and the raw emotions oozing from the screen. Opinions are being thrown around with reckless abandonment. People are judging others left and right, all because someone else’s opinion doesn’t line up with theirs. It’s not a collaboration. It’s “I’m right. You’re wrong.”

Who Are We To Judge?

Opinions are just that – opinions. We are all entitled to our own opinions. If you live in the United States, you are very fortunate to have freedom of speech. But sadly in today’s society, freedom of speech has somehow been stretched to the extremes by people who think they can say whatever they want to, without taking into consideration the harm it can cause the person who absorbs their criticism and proverbial daggers.

Let’s remind ourselves that we are all on this Earth to positively impact the lives of others. We are supposed to be servants. We are here to be of service to others. To provide support, guidance, tough love, etc. to both friends and strangers. We are not built to go through life alone. We are supposed to join others in our journey and lean on the support of those around us.

When we judge others, it speaks volumes about our character. It provides evidence that we are not in sync with our purpose in life. We are telling ourselves that we would rather put down others to benefit our situation, instead of lifting up someone else for their benefit.

Our image trumps our purpose.

So who are we to judge? We are not perfect. None of us are. So why make others feel like they are less than perfect, when in reality, we are cut from the same cloth as everyone else?

Your Faith Is Not Perfect

After I had finished reading the comment thread, I tried to process all of the hate and closed-minded opinions I had seen.

My thoughts then traveled to the players – the people who are playing for coaches who are carrying around this hatred and who are not afraid to judge others. I thought about the players who only have one chance at playing the game they love to the best of their ability. One chance at finding out how they like to do it. One chance at finding faith in themselves.

Even well-intentioned coaches have opinions about how a player should swing a bat. But at the end of the day, the player needs to believe in what he is doing. You can listen to someone’s opinion on what they think you need to do, but ultimately it’s up to you to have faith in yourself, faith in your abilities and faith in what got you there in the first place. You were blessed with unique abilities and talents.  Now it’s your job to understand your shape.

Your faith in yourself is not based on the idea that you will be perfect. Rather, it will allow you to do everything within your control to be the best version of yourself.

So the next time you are in a situation where you or someone else wants to be the first to throw a stone, just remember this:

More faith. Less opinion.

Love,

KW

For more than a decade, Kevin Wilson has been one of the most respected hitting coaches in the game. He works behind the scenes as a private hitting consultant to some of the best hitters in Major League Baseball. In 2013, Kevin was the hitting coach for the USA Baseball 18U National Team. Team USA beat Japan for the Gold medal at the IBAF World Cup in Taichung, Taiwan.

He is the author of the Amazon #1 Best Seller The #GoodBatting Book and co-hosts a popular podcast, KWB Radio, that showcases unique conversations with the pros. If you want Kevin to speak at your next event or if you want take advantage of his popular 2-day KWB Experience for players and coaches, contact Kevin today!

Follow Kevin on twitter @KWBaseball and visit his website KWBaseball.com

Only you can be you.

Each of us are uniquely designed. No one has the exact same mix of factors that make you unique. That means no one else on Earth will ever be able to swing the bat or play the role exactly the same way you do.

Your abilities are the natural talents you were born with. Some people have the ability to hit with power. Others have the ability to make consistent contact no matter where the ball is thrown. Few can switch hit. Some will succeed with a no-stride stance. No matter what your natural talents are, they are unique to YOU.

You are the only person on Earth who can use your abilities. Someone can’t walk into a department store and buy a large box of your unique talents, rush out onto the field and expect to perform with them. Many hitters today are swinging someone else’s swing and expecting the same results as the other person. It’s sad to see so many hitters who discount their own unique talents, never reaching their full potential because they are so wrapped up in doing it how someone else likes to do it.

Your abilities were not given to you by God just to make a living. He equipped us with all that we need to live our lives fully. And knowing this, we should seriously examine what we are good at doing. So many spend time focusing on their weaknesses, that they forget or neglect to focus on their strengths. Joe Ferraro and I spoke about this at length on KWB Radio. You can listen to that episode here.

Focus On Your Strengths

Time and time again, hitters will readily tell me everything they can’t do, but when asked what they are good at, they have to pause and think about it.

This is the moment when they begin to realize they don’t know what they don’t know.

Because you are unique, there will be times when you feel like you are different, or perhaps an outcast. You will feel like you don’t fit in. These are all natural feelings we experience in our daily lives. So instead of resenting or rejecting who you are and the talents you posses, celebrate how you can uniquely impact your environment with your talents.

Part of accepting your shape is recognizing your limitations.

Nobody is good at everything and no one is called to be everything. We all have defined roles. We need to “stay in our lane” so we can intentionally focus on mastering our strengths. Many of us running through life, will look into the other lane and become envious or distracted. Simply focus on the gifts you possess and try and develop them to best of your abilities.

When we focus on our strengths and being the best version of ourselves, we begin to enjoy the personal satisfaction of having done our jobs well, and we won’t need to compare ourselves to anyone else.

There is a danger in comparing ourselves to others.

One, you will always be able to find someone who can do it better than you. This can easily cause you to be discouraged. Two, you will always find someone who doesn’t do it as well as you do and you can become full of pride. Either attitude will rob you of your joy in living in your shape.

Along your journey, you will inevitably find people who don’t understand your uniqueness or shape. They will criticize you and try and get you to conform to what they think you should be doing. My advice for you is to ignore them. For example, if your hitting coach is forcing you into a swing that you know won’t work for you, you instantly know that coach isn’t in it for you. Stand up for what you know works for you, and continue working towards becoming the best version of yourself.

Develop Your Shape

Once you’ve found your unique skills and talents, start developing in knowledge and understanding of your shape. Find out what you’re good at and work to develop your uniqueness. Think about your shape as a muscle. If you don’t exercise, your muscles will weaken. In the same way, if you don’t work on your unique abilities and skills, you will lose them.

Whatever talents you have been given can be enlarged and developed through deliberate practice – practice that promotes purpose and an understanding of WHY you’re doing what you’re doing. It’s also important to point out that studying your craft and being open to constructive feedback, will allow you to become a better version of yourself.

No one is perfect. I see young players coming up in today’s game trying to perfect a swing and they wonder why they aren’t successful. Instead, they should be developing ways that allow them to master their swings and approaches, put themselves in positions to stretch themselves and learn all they can to be the best version of themselves.

Take advantage of every training opportunity to develop your shape and sharpen your talents.

Before you go to bed tonight ask yourself this question: How can I make the best use of the talents that God has given me?

Love,

KW

For more than a decade, Kevin Wilson has been one of the most respected hitting coaches in the game. He works behind the scenes as a private hitting consultant to some of the best hitters in Major League Baseball. In 2013, Kevin was the hitting coach for the USA Baseball 18U National Team. Team USA beat Japan for the Gold medal at the IBAF World Cup in Taichung, Taiwan.

He is the author of the Amazon #1 Best Seller The #GoodBatting Book and co-hosts a popular podcast, KWB Radio, that showcases unique conversations with the pros. If you want Kevin to speak at your next event or if you want take advantage of his popular 2-day KWB Experience for players and coaches, contact Kevin today!

Follow Kevin on twitter @KWBaseball and visit his website KWBaseball.com

A few years ago, there was a player who came to me who was struggling. He was once a top prospect, and he had really started to dig himself a deep hole. He didn’t lose his swing, as much as he was losing his mind. He was in a dark place in his life, and baseball was something he was beginning to HATE.

He picked up the phone and called me.

I was ready to help.

For me, it’s easy to teach someone how to swing a bat. It’s easy to teach them how to HIT. But the hard part is trying to figure out the person – who they are, what strengths they possess, while diving deep into their person to find who they are at the core.

There are so many variables at play when you start to teach the person first.

Back to the player I mentioned earlier. The darkness that hung over him is never a good place for anyone to be, let alone a baseball player trying to make it to the big leagues. The pressure of playing at the highest level brings feelings and experiences that you didn’t even think could happen when you first embarked on your journey. Over the course of time as you rise through the levels in the minor leagues, you become more and more aware of how stressful it is on not only yourself but your family and friends. But nonetheless, we have a lot of work to do.

So I began to dig deep down to find out who the person really is.

I began to take walks with him. I wanted to know his background. Where he grew up. WHY he was playing baseball. What his hobbies were outside of the game. What his relationship was like with his family.

Everyone Is An Individual

We all come from different backgrounds, which provides us different experiences. And from those experiences come different feelings, emotions, doubts, fears, strengths, visions, etc. Each experience is unique to the individual, and you can’t change the past. But what we can do is work on influencing the future.

So in order for his swing and approach to play at the highest level, we needed to find out what he was made of. I started firing questions at him, trying to pull the information out of his heart and not just from the automative response his brain thinks I want to hear.  Every question has a purpose because every answer slowly reveals every thread of who he is.  To be someone a player trusts, I have to be a world-class listener, and if I’m going to open my mouth and give him advice on how to swing a bat, or how to HIT, I can’t do so until I know exactly who he is.

In the midst of my usual process of “digging deep” into the player’s past, we uncovered something that he had never taken a closer look at before.

His faith.

He came from a strong Christian background and grew up in the faith. But like most of us who play the game at the professional level, the environment and stresses lead players to either stop practicing their
faith, or push them farther and farther away from what they believe in.

In our conversations, I noticed that in the past when he was doing well, he was a different person – a man who leaned on his faith for his courage, strength, mindset and confidence. It was a subtle, but recurring theme that I was picking up on. I also noticed that he was not giving it much thought as to WHY he did well with it and didn’t do well without it. He was caught so far down in his rabbit hole, that it wasn’t as clear to him, as it was to me.

So instead of going to the cage to fix his swing and approach, we went to the Bible.

Yes, the Bible.

He had become selfish. It was all about him. He began to compare himself to other players. He was so enamored with how others were performing compared to him, that he became jealous instead of grateful. He used to be a good teammate, but now he was burning more bridges than he even realized.

So, we took the focus off him and put it on others. I reminded him that we are all on this Earth to positively impact the lives of others. I told him that if you don’t believe me, take a look in the Bible. He struggled at first, like many of us do when we are deep in uncharted waters. He wanted to believe me. He knew deep down that this was the right move because once upon a time he had been that giving, caring and unselfish person. But as is the case with most things in life, it was easier said than done.

But nonetheless we began to dive into his faith. We started finding verses in the Bible that related to where he was in his life both on and off the field. Slowly but surely, he began to change. I could tell by his demeanor that he wasn’t fighting as much. His tone had become calmer. He was beginning to become more reflective. He made a conscious effort to spend time getting to know his teammates. He was starting to find his PURPOSE and WHY again in life and baseball.

And in the midst of all of this, a pretty cool thing started to happen…he began to hit the ball. He started to crush doubles and homers. His strikeouts fell, and his on-base percentage went up. And all of this happened without showing him a new-age swing, sitting him down in front of slo-motion video or trying to improve his launch angle.

He simply found his way back to his faith.

Whatever your faith is, whatever or whoever you believe in, there is something special about being in sync with WHY you’re on this Earth. When you feel you’re walking alongside someone/something else and you’re not alone, the weight of the world is lifted off your shoulders.

We can’t do it alone. We need someone who we can trust to experience this life together.

Over time, I get to know the player extremely well, and the player gets the opportunity to learn about me and my past. I make sure I share with them my faults and mistakes, not just my success. The role of a mentor and leader is to show times of vulnerability. Times where you allow the person you’re mentoring into your life, so that you can share wisdom, not just knowledge.

Wisdom is an important part of teaching, coaching, mentoring and leading. Wisdom comes from experience. Knowledge only comes from textbooks.

When sharing wisdom and life lessons with players, I give them an opportunity to see that they are not alone. When I do this, they begin to trust me because now they understand that I’m helping them from experience, not because the diploma on my wall says “you’re now an ‘expert.’”

During the process of sharing experiences with each other, a beautiful thing begins to happen. I am no longer their “hitting coach.” I become their mentor. Their friend. Their confidant. Someone who they can come to with thoughts and feelings on things outside of hitting a baseball.

Initially, you may call me to work with your swing and approach, but you end up realizing you’re looking for someone to walk alongside you during some of the most difficult times in your life.

And when that moment comes, I’m grateful for the opportunity to be that person you choose to be by your side.

Love,

KW

For more than a decade, Kevin Wilson has been one of the most respected hitting coaches in the game. He works behind the scenes as a private hitting consultant to some of the best hitters in Major League Baseball. In 2013, Kevin was the hitting coach for the USA Baseball 18U National Team. Team USA beat Japan for the Gold medal at the IBAF World Cup in Taichung, Taiwan.

He is the author of the Amazon #1 Best Sellers The #GoodBatting Book and Finding Clarity: A Mindful Look Into the Art of Hitting and co-hosts a popular podcast, KWB Radio, that showcases unique conversations with the pros. If you want Kevin to speak at your next event or if you want take advantage of his popular 2-day KWB Experience for players and coaches, contact Kevin today!

Follow Kevin on twitter @KWBaseball and visit his website KWBaseball.com

With the Major League Baseball Draft recently completed, many players heard their name called. But what about those who waited by their TV’s, phones, tablets or computers for three straight days and never heard their names called?

Any person, in any walk of life, faces a number of circumstances throughout the course of their lifetime. Events and situations (not hearing your name called in the MLB Draft) can cause feelings of fear, doubt or depression. Players ultimately find themselves in a situation which forces them to make a decision – a decision that could completely change their outlook and their life. Even guys in the Big Leagues face challenges that can completely change their outlook.  If you haven’t already, take a look at this conversation with an MLB All-Star when he was at a crossroads.

How many of you have been in a situation where you felt that you had no control of the environment around you? The MLB Draft is a great example of this. It’s an incredibly nerve-wracking experience as you wait by a piece of electronic equipment with the fate of your baseball career in the hands of someone you may, or may not, know. So many thoughts run through your mind as the draft unfolds, but what happens when you don’t hear your name called? How do you react?

Or better yet, how do you respond?

I like to remind players that how you respond to a situation can literally change the situation itself. Because the way you choose to interpret your experiences determines the way you live your life.

You worked so hard to get to a level in your career where scouts start to take notice. They start to know you by name and face. They start to spend a few minutes with you before or after your game. You learn their first, as well as their last names. You get the opportunity to fill out questionnaires. You start to feel like your dream of getting drafted into Major League Baseball, could actually become a reality.

Not just a hope.

Not a wish and a prayer.

A real thing.

But after sitting by the computer for three stressful days, your name is never called.

You are numb. The memories of your hard work, blood, sweat and tears race through your mind. The fog lays heavy in front of your eyes.

You can’t believe it. It was all for naught. What a waste of time.

That’s it.

It’s over.

How Will You Respond?

If you want to be a professional baseball player, this is the question you will need to ask yourself.  Will you fill with anger? Will you blame the scout who said he loved the way you played? “If he loved me so much, why didn’t he draft me then?”

Or do you blame the system?  “They don’t know what they are doing. They drafted a kid who barely played last year!” Or, “I hit .280 in the SEC, but they took a kid who hit .330 at a small DIII school in North Dakota?!”

If your name wasn’t called in the draft, what I’m about to tell you is not what you want to hear, but it’s what you need to hear.  You are not responding.  You are simply reacting to the event and its outcomes which didn’t play out in your favor. If you ever want to play this game professionally, you must stop reacting and start responding.

So when adversity knocks on the door, how will you respond?

Will you become soft and wallow in your pain and suffering? Will you be steadfast in your approach and be too proud to change or adapt? Or will you evaluate the situation and see it at face value, knowing that how you respond (your attitude) can literally change the situation itself?

Responding (instead of reacting) to not hearing your name called on draft day changes your current situation as well as your future. When you step back and view the draft situation from a third party lens, you begin to put the draft in its proper place. Through your eyes, it’s the most important and significant event in your life. But from someone just walking in on this particular chapter in your life, it’s just one experience in your overall journey in life.

Reflecting on this situation allows you to start creating a vision. You can see how many experiences are available just on the other side of the present. You learn that the obstacle (not being drafted) turns out to be your path; that in every wall, there is a door.

Stepping back and observing the scene before you take any action, requires practicing a key part of the process – patience. It’s something we all have the ability to do, but it’s also the hardest thing to implement. We live in a microwave society where patience is severely lacking, and we are more likely to be “first and wrong,” rather than be “last and right.” Practicing patience allows us to make the right decision for long run, rather than the right decision for now.

We don’t choose the experiences of failure and defeat in our lives. But we can choose how we respond to them. We are not responding to the event itself, rather, we are responding to how we interpret that event. This is how you turn defeats into triumphs.

Whatever challenge you may be facing today, take a step back, take a breath, then have the courage to respond to whatever stands in your way.

Remember, you are always in control.

Simply respond.

Love,

KW

For more than a decade, Kevin Wilson has been one of the most respected hitting coaches in the game. He works behind the scenes as a private hitting consultant to some of the best hitters in Major League Baseball. In 2013, Kevin was the hitting coach for the USA Baseball 18U National Team. Team USA beat Japan for the Gold medal at the IBAF World Cup in Taichung, Taiwan.

He is the author of the Amazon #1 Best Seller The #GoodBatting Book and co-hosts a popular podcast, KWB Radio, that showcases unique conversations with the pros. If you want Kevin to speak at your next event or if you want take advantage of his popular 2-day KWB Experience for players and coaches, contact Kevin today!

Follow Kevin on twitter @KWBaseball and visit his website KWBaseball.com

The voices inside our head have been there from the day we were born. They have found real estate, built a house and have secured residency. They are the neighbors who never move, never stay quiet and never seem to take a vacation.

Many of us have heard others tell us to “listen to your heart” or “listen to your gut.” when faced with big decisions in our life. While this isn’t necessarily bad advice, it’s certainly limiting.

Throughout a typical day, there are hundreds of voices that dance around in our head. They typically play it safe – frequently talking us out of doing things, as well as create serious doubt during the most significant moments in our life.

Some experts say you should quiet the voices in your head to focus better. You have to find ways to squash the noise, in order to release your anxieties. In theory, this sounds good, but when it’s applied in real life, you can’t just put a band-aid on an open wound.

“Self-talk” is one of the most underutilized tools when it comes to courage, confidence and resilience. And most of us don’t understand that we “talk to ourselves” constantly throughout the day.

For starters, sometimes we talk ourselves into things. We might say, “I know the pitcher has a nasty curveball, so I don’t want to hit that. I can hit his fastball, so with less than two strikes I’m going to get ready to hit only his fastball in my zone.”

On the other hand, we talk ourselves out of things. When thinking about starting a company, we tell ourselves it’s too risky. When trying out for the team in high school, we can find a multitude of excuses why we will never make it. Whatever it is, we are constantly talking ourselves into or out of something.

If we are more conscious and purposeful about the conversations we have with ourselves, the more effective we can be as leaders, coaches, players and human beings.

Going Against The Grain

Exactly ten years ago I decided I wanted to embark on a 10-year plan with the end result being that I would work as a private hitting instructor for Major League and Minor League hitters. I would be a behind the scenes mentor, who would be able to help a hitter not only with his swing, but more importantly his mindset and internal faith.

In 2007 when I made the decision to chase my goal, I was six years into being a successful hitting instructor, giving lessons in and around the Philadelphia area. At that time, I only shared my vision with a few of my closest advisors and mentors. In fact, one of my mentors forecasted it most accurately when he said that in 10 years I would not only achieve my goal, but would find my next 10-year plan in the process. I’m still amazed how accurate he was and I’m so grateful for his guidance and belief in me.

I share this with you because when more and more people found out about my plan, it wasn’t always welcomed with such optimistic and genuine support. I had more than my fair share of doubters, but so is the case with anyone doing something considered “outside of the box.” One person, in particular, scoffed at my idea saying I didn’t have the experience or knowledge at the big league level and that MLB hitters would never trust a guy who never played in the big leagues. If I ever see this person again, I will thank him from the bottom of my heart for doubting me. Because he was the fuel to my fire.

As the doubters entered into my life, the voices in my head became louder and louder.  And in a moment of weakness, I thought maybe they could be right.  Maybe I wasn’t cut out for this dream, and maybe this journey would inevitably end just like my journey playing this game. It was tough not to listen at first because they reminded me of my own fears.

 With every step forward I took, my fears followed. They told me everything that could go wrong. They told me I wasn’t qualified. They told me no one else was doing what I do, and it will never catch on. They began tripping me at every step, and at every cross-roads, they tried to steer my ship onto a bed of rocks.

The voice in my head threatened to derail my journey and end my goals and dreams – if only I had listened to them.

I had enough. It was time I stopped listening to myself, and I began talking to myself.

Walk The Talk

I began talking to myself in the mirror, telling myself that I could do this, that I was good enough and I was brave enough. In my car on the way to the facility, I told myself I was “the man.” I constantly talked to myself, instilling any piece of confidence I could day in and day out. I knew I had to be consistent in order to squash the negativity and doubt.

Some days, I felt like it was never going to happen. One rejection after another came through, and those were the moments when I caved and started to listen to myself, “maybe I’m not cut out to do what I’ve been dreaming of.” But then, I forced myself to start talking to myself again, “In every wall there is a door, we just have to find it. Don’t stop. Never quit. Keep going.” It was a never ending cycle of ups and downs, but through it all I worked extremely hard to make sure there wasn’t a day that went by that I talked to myself about what I could do.

And if I had listened to myself instead of talking to myself, I wouldn’t be living out my WHY today – to help, inspire, impact and influence others in a positive manner.

The Road Less Traveled

The self-help market is flooded by so many “roses and rainbow” strategies. People who have never had a bad day, or haven’t experienced trauma in their lives, selling us their “10-steps to becoming a better _________.” Now, I’m not indicating that I wish hard times on you, but if we want to bring a dream into reality, we actually need a few roadblocks and failures in our lives to push us, define us, and reveal our purpose and true WHY. Then, and only then, will be we qualified to share with others the real meaning of perseverance.

So, if we are going to give ourselves the best chance to succeed, we should think about talking to ourselves more and listening to ourselves less. Because if we listen to ourselves, the little person on our shoulder will probably undersell our talents, squash our dreams and prevent us from living a life filled with purpose.

How we react to a situation can literally change the situation itself, so talk your way into becoming that person you are called to be.

Love,

KW

For more than a decade, Kevin Wilson has been one of the most respected hitting coaches in the game. He works behind the scenes as a private hitting consultant to some of the best hitters in Major League Baseball. In 2013, Kevin was the hitting coach for the USA Baseball 18U National Team. Team USA beat Japan for the Gold medal at the IBAF World Cup in Taichung, Taiwan.

He is the author of the Amazon #1 Best Sellers The #GoodBatting Book and Finding Clarity: A Mindful Look Into the Art of Hitting and co-hosts a popular podcast, KWB Radio, that showcases unique conversations with the pros. If you want Kevin to speak at your next event or if you want take advantage of his popular 2-day KWB Experience for players and coaches, contact Kevin today!

Follow Kevin on twitter @KWBaseball and visit his website KWBaseball.com